Renewal

For the last few months, myself and a group of girls from my church had been planning a Women's Retreat.

When I was approached to lead this team, 

that lil' voice inside of me screamed, 

"ME? Are you serious?" 

Self doubt is such a bummer!

But I took on this challenge because I knew that it wasn't about me. 

So, we planned for months.

Every week meeting, & brainstorming.

We decided on the theme:

 "renew."

Psalm 51:10

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

Looking back now,

this theme had so much to do with me.

I needed to be renewed.

I needed to let go for a change.

The day came. I woke up way to early.

Excited about the day.

Anxious because this was the first day I was leaving Lucas.

I worried, but completely trusted Kyle.

(He did GREAT btw. Perfect actually.)

The location was amazing.

High up in the mountains.

Besides a quick downpour and a few soaked ladies,

the worship was beautiful

and the messages were a gift.

Each message was so different, but melted so well together.

A message from a young mother and her love of the gospel.

A message from a missionary and how she incorporates her gift for missions into her family life.

And a seasoned vet: a women who has seen it all, been through it all and gives God all the glory.

I was so busy all day running back & forth,

not until the end of the day did my emotions really kick in.

We started praying for women.

Women whose marriages are crumbling, and want so desperately to be saved.

Women with sick children.

My heart was so full.

This day was for them.

A day where women were together, inspiring and encouraging one another...

I felt lucky to be there and so thankful that God chose me to be a part of this. I'm so glad He loves me & see's me for who I really am under all this. And regardless of how I see myself, He sees a women who is strong and secure. 

Extracting me from my comfort zone,

which lately feels like something that is happening a lot.

Maybe it's a 30 thing.

It is a few weeks away you know. 

Ugh.

Now it's time to start planning Lucas's first birthday...hmmm...